Session 40 - Shits and Giggles

General Summary

Taking a breath, the group decided to make their way outside to let everyone know Amelie is dead and all is safe.

Before heading out, Hiraani noticed 3 pieces of a small shattered black crystal lying on the floor where the portal was. Walking over and picking a piece up, the others saw Hiraani immediately drop to the floor.

As soon as he touched the crystal, everything around him changed. The smell of brimstone and mold as well as and intense heat filled his senses. The floors replaced now with grates and an endless darkness below. The walls a mismatch of pieces of metal, leather and skin. The pillars now parts of bone and bodies keeping the roof up.

All around him he was surrounded by an endless army of undead creatures. Zombies, some armoured, some not, huge beasts of all sizes, mutated and waiting. Taking a step back, he dropped the crystal and in that moment, shot back to the chamber he was previously in.

Telling everyone what had happened, Graa didnt believe him and was offered the crystal. Taking the crystal, nothing happens to Graa. Throwing it back to Hiraani, he cuaght it and instantly fell to the floor again and was back in this horror place. This time, when he appears, all the creatures around him are facing his way. They all draw their swords as they look at him. He immediately dropped the crystal again and came back into his own body.

Cutting some cloth off of Amelie's clothing, Lorena scooped with her hand axe the crystal parts and wrapped them up for safe keeping.

Agreeing to take the crystal to Ebras, they went ahead and tied up Bryce, healed up Ifen and went outside to the early afternoon sun in the sky.

As they got outside, Graa lifted up his wand of pyrotechnics and gave the signal that the battle is won. Lorena, too impatient, bampfed out her wings and launched into the air, through the fireworks and over the city, shooting over the wall and towards her Uncle Rab.

As Lorena flew over the Jorus fields, she saw all the soldiers dropping their weapons, some being arrested, some hugging, crying and sitting in silence while others dancing with joy below. Looking out for her uncle, it took her a while before eventually spotting him below leaning on his warhammer with soldiers around him. Giving a massive embrace telling her he is proud of her. At that point also seeing her brother Ellis, they all caught up and made their way back to Aldabra.

Back with Graa and Hiraani, Graa decided to walk in circles slowly around Bryce constantly putting his tash on causing Bryce to constantly repeat while crying "Thats a really nice tash" over and over again.

Leaving him with Ifen, Hiraani and Graa began walking throught he town to the market square. As they do, the news of what had transpired went viral ahead of them #badboys.

As the main army began arriving in the market square, Graa and Hiraani approached. In the celebrations, Graa took it upon himself to do a little stealing while no one was watching.

Meeting up, the 3 rejoin again near the fountain, share thank you's and decide to go join in the celebrations.

After some discussion, they made their way to the Ocean Breeze. As they approached, they were met by a woman with a very stuck up look on her face. Questioning them about how much coin they have, the group decided not to go and leave, this was far too snooty for their tastes, especially as they had to pay.

Moving away they went over to The Serpent instead. Approaching, this seemed like a far better place to drink and walked straight in with no issue. Approaching the bar, they all put 100gp behind the bar... except Graa who went to put 101GP behind the bar... reluctantly.

As he reached into his coin purse however, he found in place of gold coins, some had been replaced by rocks instead! Looking into his purse, he sees a glowing coin that quickly fades as it meets the light and 500gp missing. Taking the coin out that was glowing, he realised immediately this was given to him by the creature in the Feywild who flicked a gold coin at him. He looked closely and saw writing on it.

"Rub me to riches!"

Rubbing it, he immediately dissapeared from the ale house and appeared in a Dragon Lair. His eyes stung with the acidic fumes around him, behind him was a portal and ahead, lying asleep on a large rock surround by gold and riches, a giant Adult dragon lay.

Stepping back silently as to not wake him, he transported back instantly to where he last was in The Serpent. Choosing not to tell his drunk friends after realising they had drunk his alcohol while gone, he secretly put the coin in Hiraani's top pocket for safety.

Hiraani approached 2 kids, a boy and girl with a beer in their hands. Nervously, they accepted 1gp each to go and seek Elbras the wizard. They dropped they beers down and run out the door. Then turning to the barkeep he inquired about any dodgy things that could be found. He indicated that The Lost Shepherd is the place to go.

As the night carries on they get more and more drunk with everyone in town enjoying the festivities.

Towards the end of the night, Lorena decided to jump up on the bar and begin to try and balance a full pint on her head while walking across. As everyone cheered, she made her way with just a little slip and the crowd went nuts as she downed the pint!

This time Hiraani decided to go, walking across he faked a slip and jumped to the other foot much to everyones delight. Getting to the end, the crows riled up, he downed his pint and got down.

Graa now getting very merry, jumped up and casting Mage Hand strutted across the bar with ease. Stopping half way, he looked at a pretty girl in the crowd and got he mage hand to lift it up like tipping a hat and winked at her, causing her to flush. Then strutting the rest of the way, he confidently downed the pint with no hands and jumped down getting the biggest cheer of the night.

Seeing the 3 girls who were interested in Graa's performance, Hiraani walked over to them and suggested if they really like him, they should take him to bed and leave a little something of themselves in the bed as Graa likes the cigar. 2 of them immediately drew back in disgust and stormed off, while one just smiled and seemed very intrigued.

The girl walked over to Graa and introduced herself. Asking if he is busy for the rest of the night, she made him pay for a room, took his hand and dragged him upstairs while his confident demanour changed to one of sheepishness.

Laughing at their friend, Hiraani and Lorena left and went for a night cap at The Lost Shepherd as a nervous Graa makes for a night of dirty fun.

Hiraani approached the barman and asked using his secret code about where they can get access to more secret things. The barman asked him to return tomorrow mid day to the building round the corner. They will find what they are after.

Getting a table in the corner, they both drank themselves to sleep both resting alongside each other.

Waking in the morning, the pair very hung over, got up and made their way back to find Graa.

Graa awakening finds himself being ushured back into a morning session with the lady of whom he still does not know the name of. Ania feels like her name now. Once again he wasn't fully up to the task, something slippery and wet kept taking him out of his ryhtmn and he decided it must be because it had been so long. Picking herself up out of bed with a smile, she still got to sleep with a hero after all, and washing herself in a basin, she smiles and walks out the room.

As he looks now around the room, he lets out a giant scream. At that point, down stairs, Hiraani and Lorena had just entered The Serpent. Hearing the scream, they drew their swords running up to him and slamming the door open.

It was the smell that hit them first. The overpowering smell of shit. Shit of someone who has not eaten very well. Looking around the room, they saw shit, everywhere. The sheets of the bed covered, the floors and walls marked with the excrement. Looking to the side, on top of the wardrobe in the room they saw Graa there, screaming and croached into the small space trying to get away from it.

"Did you do that Graa!?!" Lorena said "That Woman was a slattern" he cried, "Look what she did" pointing furiously!

At this point the barmen entered "WHAT THE HELL!"

"I don't know what sort of people you usally get in this place" Graa said very sturnly now... from the top of the wardrobe

"There's shit everywhere! It wasn't us!"

"Well I am a Tiefling and we only deficate every 2 weeks, its not mine."

"Then how did this get here then?"

"It was the Wench!" Graa shouted at him

"Hold on sir, the rooms are per person sir, if there was someone else here then you owe us more money"

... Graa froze and reluctantly said "Ugh, I think I must have had too much to drink.. ye... yes it is my turd. I forgot its my 2 week cycle. No need for an extra charge."

The barman immediately felt guilty about seeming racist and appologised for not knowing more about the Tiefling race. He promised not to make that mistake again and Graa and the gang, handing him a few coppers for his troubles and his silence, made their way back out of the tavern once Graa had climbed down off the wardrobe.

Coming out they made their way over tot he Aldabra estate for potential breakfast. Entering into the house, Lorena led them to the main eating chamber where they were met with Monty, Ania, Ifen, Rab and in the corner Crispin. "My student returns! You have been busy!"

Report Date

06 Dec 2021